25 October, 2013

Silent Love with Shocking Insult

By: Faisal Anas

Once when I was free from all work and sitting with free mind. I was alone. It was some noise around me sounded by some persons sitting next to me is a group and discussing about some serious subject secretly. I was unable to understand their talks because the only sound I could hear was their murmuring and whispering but their activities were notifying me that they may had been talking about me. It was very surprising situation for me because no one of them was known to me and I think I was unknown for them too. May be, they might see me at any place before that time but what they were talking about was still an unanswered question. They were 5 or 6 and I was alone sitting and thinking with no physical activity by hands or legs but yes some gestures of eyes I was using to them, to birds on the tree and sometime to the person who were passing through the pavements and seeing me once and then taking their own way. The situation continues till I decided to leave the place.
Before I do that a girl came to me and asked the permission to sit beside me. I nodded my head showing my agreement to her to sit. First she smiled then said “Hi!” All of her mates were looking at us but when I looked to them they moved their face towards another side and this happened continuously till my meeting with her ended. I said “Hi!” to her and then silent. She was also silent. She was sitting and her one leg was upon another. She was in blue jeans and black T-shirt. Hairs are open. Everything of her were whitish-red with same shining except hairs and eyes. Eyes and hairs were extremely black with high shining. I knew that the shining of hairs was due to the oil and shampoo but the shining in her eyes………..? What for? Couldn’t say. It was very difficult situation for me to face any girl in that manner for the first time in my life.
Being a sitter opposing a beautiful girl of same age as me, I was in surprise because it happened accidentally and unexpected and especially for me it was uncommon. And surprisingly, she was smiling only for me and really let me say that it was no hard work from my side to call her or attract her. Both of us were still silent. I was waiting for her next voice and she was also. When a few minutes passed, I decided to start the conversation to break the silence. I said “ji kahiye” (yes, say!). But she was still silent. She looked at my face once, smiled and turned her face downward. Now her silence was increasing my interesting to her. I thought she had same special to say to tome and that’s why she was feeling shy and could not say and hoping me to understand without saying because what she wanted to say via tongue was the voice of heart as usually happen when a couple of same age sit alone. And you know the voice or feeling of heart which we want to forward to someone sitting before us does not need tongue because heart should contact directly without taking help from tongue and eyes contact eyes directly and say whatever it want.
I was not uncommon, I understand why she came to me. Why she sat beside me. Why she smiled why all of her mates looking to s with full interest and why she was silent with same lovely thinking in her heart, smile on her lips , dimple on her cheeks and love with shy in eyes. Time passed, now I was interested too much to listen her as I called her and went to her. She was silent but I was discomfort. She was well but I was feeling unwell. She was sitting with calm but I was changing my sitting styles every moment. I had spoken, now it was her turn to speak, to break the silence, to say something, to voice her greed, to tell her purpose of coming but alas her voice was still a prisoner in her mouth and her purpose in her heart. I repeated again “ji kahiye kaise aana hua?” (Speak out what for you came here?) “ji aapse kuchh kehna tha” ( I came to say something to you), she replied. “Sure”, I said. Then she looked at her friends whose smiles turned into laugh now and they were seemed that they were sitting in a comedy show. Our situation of sitting and the whereabouts environment was joyful for them because they were already known of the purpose of coming the girl. She had not come accidentally or with no reason. But she came after a long discussion between them. They decided to send her to me to say something to me. What was that? I didn’t know. I was same as you are now. Too much excited to know what was in her heart. What she wanted to say. The purpose of coming. The purpose of smiling. The purpose of shy and the purpose of their laughs. “ji, who, aapkaa” (ur, urs, that) she voiced with some shy including smile and fun. “What………?” I asked loudly now. Now she said: “aapkaa naada latak raha he” (your …………… is hanging) “oh no, ok, thanks” I voiced. Then she stood and said. “ji bas mai yehi kehne ayi thi” ( I came here to inform you about this) uuunnnnnnn you can guess about the situation of that time and my physical, mental and physiological condition and please don’t ask me anything more. I couldn’t say to her nay thing more and I can’t write anything more now. Bye.
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